Mommy, I Love you This Much!

Here is a cute project that my son did for his class. I was definitely touched by it. It says "I love you this much, Mommy!" The hands cut-out is actually his own hands and I guess his teachers helped him with the scissors. This project just made it more special because Josh and I used to read the book "Guess How Much I Love You" and it's one of our favorite go-to books. Especially when he was being difficult about his food, and I'd use this to act out the book so as to distract him.

Honey, Mommy loves you THHHHIIIIISSSSS MUCH!

Kenji Lee's Milestones

Kenji is turning 1 year old in a couple of months and so far, we've been hitting our monthly milestones much earlier than expected.  My brave little daredevil has been crawling and cruising around the house for quite a while now.  We've had several bumps and bruises along the way, with a few sprinkling of tears, but we've been very fortunate that he is growing up to be a happy, healthy little boy.

Some milestones for my little Kenji:

• Started sitting on his own by 5 months old.
• Can now stand and cruise while holding on to furniture.  I think he'll be walking soon.
• Clapping his hands together.
• Waving bye bye to Mommy and Daddy.
• Crawling and playing peek-a-boo.
• Laughs a lot especially when Ahiya Josh is playing with him.
• Trying to wrestle away toys from Ahiya.
• Babbling, shouting and calling our dog Hiro.
• Understands some of the things that we tell him.  I would ask him if he wants Mommy to carry him and he'd immediately extend his hands so that I would!  
• Can eat solids now - rice, sliced fruits, meat, veggies, you name it, he'll eat it.  He doesn't like mushy stuff.
• Likes Mommy to read him his books.  I think that's the only time he'd sit still on my lap.

I will add more things to this when I can think of them.

How to Help Your Children Be Free of Stress and Anxiety

By Dr. Wayne W. Dyer
Expert Content  |  June 15, 2010

   

What do you want most for your children?Dr. Wayne W. Dyer, father of eight children, has spent plenty of time trying to figure out just that! Get his five suggestions to help your children live happy and stress-free lives without limits. 

Everyone is entitled to feel peaceful within; happiness and fulfillment are the birthright of every single human being on our planet. Twenty-five years ago, I wrote a book called What Do You Really Want for Your Children? (Morrow, 1985). At that time, I wanted to offer a way for parents to help their children achieve what moms and dads around the world want for their kids: to value themselves, to be risk-takers, to be self-reliant, to be free from stress and anxiety, to have peaceful lives, to celebrate their present moments, to experience a lifetime of wellness, to be creative, to fulfill their higher needs and to feel a sense of purpose—that is, to be no-limit people. As a parent of eight children, I consider it my greatest parenting achievement that my kids are now all no-limit adults.

When I learned my voice was going to be used in an animated Pixar film, it reminded me that we are, in fact, all still children inside, striving as adults to be all the things we want for our kids. While our entire world seems to be anxiety-ridden these days, I offer the following suggestions I wrote to parents 25 years ago, the children of whom likely have their own kids today. See if they work in your efforts with children, regardless of their ages, and even with yourself, since you too have a child inside who wants to come out and enjoy life.

   

Relax in your efforts to have young children get ahead of the game early in life.

It is not necessary to spend endless hours teaching children reading, math, foreign languages and the like, long before school begins. While it is absolutely wonderful and helpful to allow them to explore everything as young toddlers, the pressure to excel, to be ahead of the other children, all in the name of being fast and first at what they do, is putting the anxiety pressure on when they are still in diapers. Children need to develop at their own pace. They will walk when they are ready. They will not embarrass themselves in college with dirty diapers simply because they are not toilet trained sooner than other toddlers. It will come. Relax. Do no force them. Allow them to enjoy their young years. While it is nice to be highly motivated, it is also nice to be well balanced. Being able to relax and enjoy life is at least equal, if not superior, to being at the head of the class and always being nervous inside because of an inordinate need to be first.

Examine your own life for stress that you may be modeling.

Stop trying to be the perfect mother, father, wife, single parent, homemaker, teacher, aunt, counselor or whatever. There is no such thing as a flawless person, so why not give up that ghost in favor of being a stress-free, happy person? You will never be appreciated by everyone all the time for everything you do, and any amount of upset you have because people do not appreciate you is a waste of your present moments. Do the things you do because you choose to do them, not so you will be seen as perfect. The best role model you can be is one who is happy, stress-free and feeling good about yourself.

Give children an opportunity to have the luxury of a sense of privacy.

Don't make them feel pressured to be with other people all the time. Children need to learn how to be alone. Many children complain constantly that they are bored, they have nothing to do and they hate leisure time. These are the sentiments of children who have grown up thinking others have a duty to keep them entertained. They have always had some kind of activity, and if they get bored, then someone will take care of things for them by taking them somewhere or turning on the TV or buying a new toy. This is a child who is growing up expecting action all the time. This translates to anxiety about having to be alone. Let them play alone; in fact, encourage it. Expose them to books, newspapers and magazines right from the very beginning. Let them have a place where they can go to be alone without feeling that they are doing something wrong. Privacy is terrifically important as a way to avoid anxiety, and the child who experiences it when very young, and learns not to be threatened by it, will have a big head start on not feeling anxious when "there is nothing to do."

Try to remove the pressure on children to acquire external rewards throughout their lives.

Help them to focus on the pure enjoyment of playing baseball, rather than on winning a trophy. Teach them to love baseball all of their lives, rather than learn to avoid it because they are not supremely talented at it. Do not give them early reasons to avoid anything in life, which is precisely what you do when you place the emphasis on achieving external awards rather than internal fulfillment. Rather than focusing solely on a report card grade, which is less important later in life, talk with them about what they are studying, how they can apply it in life, whether they are happy with themselves in school, what they like to study and what meaning they see in it for them now and in the future. If they pursue only the award, once they have attained it, they may no longer wish to pursue that area or endeavor. I would assume you want your children to love music, not to pass the obligatory music class and then disavow any interest in music for a lifetime. Teach them the inner joy of learning and applying what they gain for themselves.

  

Let children set their own goals for themselves.

Stay out of the way of their grandiose dreams except to serve as a positive encourager. Most children are afraid of their own greatness and set their sights too low, or they are the product of parental interference in which parents, well intentioned though they may be, tell their children what they should aim for in life. If an 11-year-old girl wants to be a doctor, encourage her to dream in that direction, even if she hasn't shown what you think are the appropriate aptitudes or attitudes. If she is not going to become a doctor, she will make the adjustments as she goes along, and there is no problem in having to adjust one's goals. If you tell children they cannot do something or to be more realistic, you are only teaching them to distrust themselves and to become unnecessarily anxious about something that will surely work itself out.

  

No-limit children have learned a different response to the same stimuli because they know the world to be friendly. Their behavior is meant "for the best," or at least their mistakes are "honest." Therefore, if an action goes awry, it does not elicit feelings of guilt. Remorse, learning, redoing and improving are possible responses instead. Rather than worry, a no-limit child sees future events as exciting adventures, opportunities to grow, chances for fun challenges and new experiences. Since self-worth is not tied to performance, the worry about "doing well" is eliminated. No-limit children are "doers," and guilt and worry do notdo anything. Thus, it is very unlikely they would bother themselves with negative thinking or destructive behaviors.

Living is not a race; it is a journey, something to be enjoyed each day. You can do a great deal to help children to understand this important truth, and you will get a nice bonus as well—that is, a lot less anxiety for yourself as part of the bargain.

Some time ago, my mother wrote me the following poem that summarizes beautifully the feeling I want to convey to anyone involved in a child's life.

WAYNE
A mother can but guide ...
then step aside—I knew
I could not say, "This is the way
that you should go."

For I could not forsee
what paths might beckon you
to unimagined heights
that I might never know.

Yet, always in my heart
I realized
That you would touch a star . . .
I'm not surprised!
— Hazel Dyer

You can help your own children to touch their own stars if you follow that important advice. Guide, then step aside.

Dr. Wayne Dyer is the co-author of four children's books, the most recent titled, No Excuses (Hay House). His voice can be heard in the new Pixar film Day & Night, released June 18 with Toy Story 3. 

Happy Father's Day!

For driving me (Joshua) to school every morning,

For playing wrestling with us,

For taking care of our needs,

For being there when we need you,

For drying our tears when we are sad or hurt,

For loving us everyday.

Thank you and happy father's day!

WE LOVE YOU!

Not So Little Anymore

Drink of the Day:  A Tall Starbucks Caramel Frappuccino

Yesterday was a big day for me and my first born, Joshua.  It was the first day of school for my little one!   

We both got up early to get ready for school and we were out the door by 7:45am.  By 7:50am, we entered the gates of The Learning Connection in San Juan, where Joshua will be spending 2 hours a day for the rest of the school year.  We met her 3 teachers, Teacher Anne, Teacher Christina and Teacher Mariel, who were very friendly and accommodating.  Joshua was a bit shy at first and yaya had to stay with him the whole class, just to make sure that he won't cry with the new surroundings and people.  But according to yaya, Joshua didn't cry at all and by the end of the class, he was following all the teachers' activities and making new friends.  He even brought home 2 stars and a  stamp for the good job he did in class.

I guess it's a bittersweet moment for me.  On the one hand, I'm very happy and proud that my little one is growing up and starting his own adventures outside of our home.  He'll be learning new things and making new friends.  On the other hand, I'm also a bit sad....and maybe a bit nostalgic.  Because this means that my little Joshua is not so little anymore.  He'll be experiencing new things that I won't be a part of.  And he'll be forming new attachments to people I won't know very well, like his classmates.

Good luck my love.  May the world show you what a wonderful place it can be!  I will always be here to guide you and help you whenever you need me.

Thank You Boys...

Today I realized something about being a parent.  I realized that in as much as we have to teach our kids about life, they in turn also teach us valuable lessons.

I have been fretting for the past week about my son Joshua's delay in speech.  His pediatrician finally recommended that we go see a developmental pediatrician to have him evaluated and see if he needs extra help and therapy.  Joshua turned two years old last April 12th, and according to his pedia's charts, he should be speaking about 50 words by now and putting two words together and forming short sentences.  So the past few days, I've been forcing him to repeat words that I have been saying to him, before giving in to whatever he wants.  But so far no such luck for me.  Let's say I ask him to say "mama", he'd say it back to me.... say "yaya" and he'd say it again.  But do it again the third time like "dada" and he will just look at me, kiss me or distract me, but he refuses to say it.  This got me worried.  I don't know if he's just being hard headed or he really doesn't know how to say it.  I kept on waiting and waiting for him to do it, until he ended up crying, which broke my heart.  So I ended up just carrying him on my shoulders and giving him a kiss instead.  After he's calmed down, I gave him a talk while carrying Kenji.  I told him that Mommy is here to teach him so he shouldn't be shy if he said his words wrong.  I just keep pushing him so that he can practice his speech and I'm always here to teach him and not laugh or judge him.  I think he got what I meant.  Coz when we proceeded to just play around and asked him what his little brother's name is, lo and behold, he answered, "Kenbi!"  

This made me realize that my son Joshua is a GENIUS!  I also realized that I should just be patient and let him develop in his own time.  And also accept him as he is.  I don't need to compare him to other kids his age, coz he might not be speaking as fluently as other kids, but his mind is probably developing at a faster rate than his tongue.  So I just have to let his speech catch up with his brain.

I also realized how lucky I am to be blessed with two wonderful sons, who are just there to love me and my husband unconditionally, and to make us smile.  We are happy to have two little miracles in our lives.  Thank you boys....We love you.

My Little Kenji Is Sick Too...

Energy Drink of the Day:  A Starbucks Grande Iced Caramel Macchiato with Forest Ham, Egg White and Cheese on Ciabata Bread (yum, yum, yum!)

My little Kenji also got sick yesterday.  He had a low fever and didn't want to be laid down at all.  I think he's teething coz I can see the shape of teeth coming out in his lower gums.  Thank God he's all better now, no more fever.  But still having trouble drinking from his bottle.  Hope he gets better by tomorrow.  At least he's all energetic and smiling again.

Also found out that some of the kids from Derrick's gathering last Sunday during the Pacquiao-Clottey fight got the fever.  I guess it really was a viral infection that got to Joshua and Kenji.

Was a bit busy at work since Cherrie left for Canada today.  Our office Internet sucks as well.  Hope we can get PLDT up and running soon so I can have Eastern cancelled.  I can get Eastern out of my hair once and for all!  Bad connection and sucky service.

Just found out from the maid that Joshua likes watching Wowowee.  He's fascinated with all the sexy girls dancing in their skimpy outfits.  According to yaya, he doesn't want them switching the channel to cartoons when he sees "Congratulations" (that's the name of one of the girls) dancing.  I know I shouldn't be encouraging this, but Rod and I find it hilarious.  I'm sure at this stage there's still no malice in Joshua's mind regarding these girls so I let him watch TV for a short while with the maid and yayas.  Will probably have to limit his TV-watching once he's a little bit more grown up.  Anyways he doesn't watch TV when his dad and I are at home.

I think I hear my hubby downstairs home from his basketball game.  Will go talk to him about our car situation for tomorrow.

My Little Joshua’s Really Sick

Energy Drink of the Day:  A Starbucks Grande Mocha Frappuccino

When I got home last night, I immediately went to look for Joshua to feel his forehead, and he was indeed HOT to the touch.  Took his temperature and turns out he had a fever, 39.1degC to be exact.  This got me worried coz the fever was a bit high, so we gave him paracetamol and asked yaya to give him lots of fluids.

 Joshua was masungit last night and he didn’t want to play at all.  He just wanted to cuddle and have me or yaya to carry him.  I guess he really wasn’t feeling very well.  He has several molars coming out of his gums as well, so maybe that’s why he had a fever.  He also didn’t sleep after waking up at 2am.  But this morning, the fever was gone and at least he was smiling.  I told yaya to continue monitoring his temperature and if he develops a fever again, to give him medicine and fluids.  I missed my happy and playful Joshua last night.  You really don’t realize what you have until you lose it, even for just a day.  I’m glad that he’s back to his happy self and playing with Kenji again today.

Kenji Lee

Energy Drink of Choice : A Grande Green Tea Frappuccino with whipped cream --> surprisingly good and refreshing

Saw my 4 1/2 old month son Kenji rolling back and forth in his crib this morning.  I was so pleased and proud of him!  This is the first time I actually saw him doing this, I thought he was only able to roll to his stomach, but wasn't able to go back to a lying position.  Well I was wrong.  My little baby's growing up so fast....

Have to call home, yaya Jean texted to say Joshua has a low fever, but I doubt that it is really a fever coz his temperature was just 37.2 deg C.  Anyway, will find out now...

Josh @ 6 months

Where did the time go?  It seems like I just gave birth a few days ago and my baby is half a year old now!  Time really flies so fast, and no matter how much we want it to stop, just for a minute, just for a second...it won't.  So it's best to cherish each and every moment that we have.

I never thought becoming a mom would impact my life so much... physically, mentally, emotionally.  

Childbirth was probably the most painful thing that I have ever experienced.  It was really excruciating, but also the most rewarding.  I didn't know that my body was capable of doing so much, and now I have a healthy baby boy to be thankful for.  Breastfeeding was probably the most frustrating thing that I had to go through, but also the most selfless and giving thing I have ever done in my life.  The sleepless nights, the hormonal turmoil, the cracked nipples, painful clogged ducts, and even the fact that most shirts didn't fit me properly made me just want to cry and quit.  But with the support and encouragement of our pediatrician and my husband, I was able to do it fully till my son was 5 months old, and still do it partially now.

My son Josh is now 6 months old and he's able to do so much.  From being a little, helpless and soft baby who is so dependent on me for all of his needs, he is nowstarting to show his personality and independence.  Josh has been a blessing to me and my husband.  He has been a very easy baby to take care of...seldom cries and smiles a lot.  A simple greeting from mommy or his Yaya Ruby can elicit a smile from him.  And laughter from people can send him into fits of giggles as well.  Hearing him laugh is just pure joy, because you know that there is no other reason behind it but contentment and wanting to hear the sound of happiness.  He can also rollover now and I think he's staring to learn to crawl as well.  Sooner or later, he'll be able to sit up on his own and start walking.  I wish he could stay this cute forever, but seeing him grow up also fascinates me.  It never ceases to amaze me that this perfect creature and miracle came from me and my husband.  I can't wait to hear him start calling us "Mommy" and "Daddy".

Rod and I are doing really well as first time parents.  We learn along the way, but I love my husband more today than I did when we got married.  I have learned a lot from him and about him the past two years that we have been together.  He has been very supportive of me every step of the way.  During my pregnancy, he took really good care of me ...from making sure that I took my fruits and vegetables everyday, to accompanying me to every hospital and doctor's visit, to being with me in the delivery room to help me welcome our baby into this world.  When I decided that I needed to go back to work after giving birth, he made it so easy for me by supporting me to buy an expensive breast pump, so that I can still continue breastfeeding even though I am at work.  I have also learned how patient he is because he knows how to handle my crying jags and unreasonable fits.  I blame it all on my hormones, but he has always been there to wipe my tears away and listen to me even if I am not making any sense.   And he even supports my bag and shoe habit!!!!  What more can a girl ask for?  

Now that we have a child, I am sure that Rod will be as good a father as he is a husband.  I know that he will teach Josh how to be a loving, God-fearing, honest and strong man that he is.  As for me, I just hope that Josh grows up to be a good and happy man, who realizes how fortunate he is to have two parents who love him very much, grandparents who adore him, and an extended family (aunts, uncles, cousins, etc) who will be there to love and support him as they watch him grow up and learn the ways of the world.

Welcome to the world Josh, Mommy and Daddy loves you!

Happy 1st Anniversary Pappy!

Dear Pappy,

 I can’t believe how fast time went by and we have now officially crossed the one year mark of married life.  The past year had been a very busy year for us.  We were able to travel and visit new places for our honeymoon, buy new furniture together, move to our new house, had some fights, and we even had the time to make a baby of our own.  I don’t think I can remember a time in my life when I have laughed this much, nor cried this much in a year!

 I just wanted to say thank you for everything that you have done for me, and continue to do for me.  I know the last two months have been very hectic and stressful for you, not only at work, but also at home.  Though sometimes it may seem like I don’t appreciate what you do for me, I want you to know that I am thankful for every little thing that you do.  Like doing the grocery shopping, or doing the laundry, or taking me to my doctor’s appointments, or putting lotion on my feet, or massaging my back when it is aching, or doing the Christmas shopping while I am stuck in bed (on doctor's orders).  I’m sorry if I am cranky or weepy sometimes, you can blame those episodes on my being hormonal.

 I hope you enjoy your trip to China with your family this time, coz this might be a last for you in a long time, hehe.  The next time you go on another trip like this, you might have to be hauling diapers and feeding bottles as well. 

 I am looking forward to the year ahead when we welcome a new addition to our family.  I’m sure you will be as good a father to our child, as you have been a good husband to me.  I can’t wait to hear our baby start calling you “Daddy” and have you wrapped around his/her little finger, hehe. 

 I love you Pappy!  Hope you also have a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!