A Mother's Prayer

Dear Lord, It’s such a hectic day,

With little time to stop and pray,
For Life’s been anything but calm,
Since You called on me to be a Mom,
Running errands, matching socks,
Building dreams with matching blocks,
Cooking, cleaning, finding shoes,
And other stuff that children lose,
Fitting lids on bottled bugs,
Wiping tears and giving hugs,
A stack of last week’s mail to read,
So where’s the quiet time I need?
Yet, when I steal a moment, Lord,
Just at the sink or ironing board,
To ask the blessings of Your grace,
I see them, in my small one’s face,
That you have blessed me
All the while –
And I stoop to kiss
That precious smile.

—–Author Unknown

For all Mothers

For all Mothers
(including soon to be Mothers)

We are sitting at lunch one day when my daughter casually mentions that she and her husband are thinking of "starting a family." "We're taking a survey," she says half-joking. "Do you think I should have a baby?"

"It will change your life," I say, carefully keeping my tone neutral.

"I know," she says, "no more sleeping in on weekends, no more spontaneous vacations."

But that is not what I meant at all. I look at my daughter, trying to decide what to tell her. I want her to know what she will never learn in childbirth classes.

I want to tell her that the physical wounds of child bearing will heal, but becoming a mother will leave her with an emotional wound so raw that she will forever be vulnerable.

I consider warning her that she will never again read a newspaper without asking, "What if that had been MY child?" That every plane crash, every house fire will haunt her.

That when she sees pictures of starving children, she will wonder if anything could be worse than watching your child die.

I look at her carefully manicured nails and stylish suit and think that no matter how sophisticated she is, becoming a mother will reduce her to the primitive level of a bear protecting her cub. That an urgent call of "Mum!" will cause her to drop a soufflé or her best crystal without a moments hesitation.

I feel that I should warn her that no matter how many years she has invested in her career, she will be professionally derailed by motherhood. She might arrange for childcare, but one day she will be going into an important business meeting and she will think of her
baby's sweet smell. She will have to use every ounce of discipline to keep from running home, just to make sure her baby is all right.

I want my daughter to know that every day decisions will no longer be routine. That a five year old boy's desire to go to the men's room rather than the women's at McDonald's will become a major dilemma. That right there, in the midst of clattering trays and screaming
children, issues of independence and gender identity will be weighed against the prospect that a child molester may be lurking in that restroom.

However decisive she may be at the office, she will second-guess herself constantly as a mother.

Looking at my attractive daughter, I want to assure her that eventually she will shed the pounds of pregnancy, but she will never feel the same about herself.

That her life, now so important, will be of less value to her once she has a child. That she would give herself up in a moment to save her offspring, but will also begin to hope for more years, not to accomplish her own dreams, but to watch her child accomplish theirs.

I want her to know that a cesarean scar or shiny stretch marks will become badges of honor.

My daughter's relationship with her husband will change, but not in the way she thinks.

I wish she could understand how much more you can love a man who is careful to powder the baby or who never hesitates to play with his child.

I think she should know that she will fall in love with him again for reasons she would now find very unromantic.

I wish my daughter could sense the bond she will feel with women throughout history who have tried to stop war, prejudice and drunk driving.

I want to describe to my daughter the exhilaration of seeing your child learn to ride a bike.

I want to capture for her the belly laugh of a baby who is touching the soft fur of a dog or cat for the first time.

I want her to taste the joy that is so real it actually hurts.

My daughter's quizzical look makes me realize that tears have formed in my eyes. "You'll never regret it," I finally say. Then I reached across the table, squeezed my daughter's hand and offered a silent prayer for her, and for me, and for all the mere mortal women who stumble their way into this most wonderful of callings.
Please share this with a Mum that you know or all of your girlfriends who may someday be Mums. May you always have in your arms the one who is in your heart.

(Author Unknown)

Happiness with...Bravery

Have you ever had the experience of expecting the worst in a situation, but it came out with the best results that you can ever pray for?  That's what happened to us this past weekend.

It started out with a "kuliti" in my eldest son's lower left eyelid a few weeks ago.  After a couple of visits to his pediatrician and ophthalmologist with applying only eye drops and warm compresses to the affected area to no avail, his ophthalmologist finally decided to do surgery to drain it.

Now my son is very prone to "kulitis".  Based on our doctor's records, we've been to her office at least once a year to have his eyes checked for various kulitis, but they all eventually resolved on their own with no further treatments.  Unfortunately this time, his kulitis (meaning two of them!) were more stubborn and didn't want to disappear.  They just got bigger and bigger and bigger that I became worried it might start affecting his vision. 

My son's condition is medically known as a chalazion.  You can read more about it here.  After deciding to go ahead with the surgery, we had to visit our pediatrician to get a clearance, since the procedure was going to be done under general anesthesia.  Just to be on the safe side, aside from doing a physical exam, the doctor also asked us to do a CBC.  And this was when I started to witness and realize how brave my little boy was.  Really!

When we went to visit the lab to have his blood test done, the cashier told me to go ahead and have his blood drawn first before paying for the test.  She said it was just to make sure that Joshua would have the test done on him, instead of him refusing and crying about it, and they would have to cancel the transaction.  This was his first time to get his blood drawn, and he didn't even flinch!  I told him not to look when the med tech was doing his thing, but he wasn't scared at all and watched the procedure being done.  He was more curious about what blood looked like and how it was being done!

After getting our results and was given the go signal by our pediatrician, I was next prepped by the anesthesiologist on what to expect and what to prepare for the next day's procedure.  Our procedure was scheduled for 7am the next morning and I was given last minute instructions with regards to fasting (no food and water after midnight), things to bring (toys and security blanket), etc. I was also told to prepare myself if ever my child becomes hysterical when he is wheeled into the operating room and also after he wakes up from the procedure when the anesthesia wears off.  So I was really mentally and emotionally preparing myself of what's to come the next day.  I also prepped Joshua of what to expect so he wouldn't be too scared about it.  I also told him that he was going to be a pirate the next day since he will be wearing an eye patch for 24 hours right after the procedure.

Well, when everything was said and done, all my worrying was for NOTHING.  My son took it like a trooper and he was even calmer than I was!  Not once did he cry from the time he was brought to the OR, where a mask was put over him so he could go to sleep during the procedure, and waking up from anesthesia with an eye-patch over his left eye.  All the doctors and nurses were praising Joshua on what a brave boy he was.  Mind you, the doctor told me that this was going to be painful after the anesthesia wears off since she will be doing an incision to take out all the yucky stuff inside.  But Joshua took it on with minimal tears and complaints.   

My brave little pirate and his partner in crime

His dad and I were so proud of him!  I can't thank God enough for blessing me with such a brave little boy!

Happiness...with "twins"!

My little ones love to dress up in similar clothes.  And I haven't really stopped them from doing so.  It's really easy to just buy two similar pieces of clothing in two different sizes and I don't have to think twice about what they will be wearing for that day!  Haha, I know it's lazy on my part, but they look quite adorable if I may say so myself.  I always get asked if they're twins too!  :P  Kenji looks up to his Ahiya so much that he wants to emulate him.  And I don't mind indulging them.  It's only a matter of time before they'd want to dress differently from each other anyway.  So I might as well take advantage of this opportunity.  Don't grow up too fast, boys!

Going to a party

Dinosaur pajamas

Going to Tai-kong's birthday party

Happiness...with growing up

I love you daddy!

Today, we reach another milestone for our eldest son.  J had his entrance exam / interview with the school of our choice.  We have enrolled him for big school for the next school year of 2013 - 2014.  I was pretty anxious about the interview as I had no idea what the tests would entail.  I just knew from asking around that there was going to be a group test and an individual test.

Since the test was going to be quite early in the morning (7:45am) to be exact, I thought it'd be better to ask my husband to accompany our son.  I would be too anxious about the whole thing, me being the stage mom and all.  My husband is more relaxed about these things and I didn't really want to pass on this anxiety to J.  Thankfully, I think he did pretty well overall.  His teachers have pretty much assured us that he was ready for this.  We'll find out by Sept. 17th if he got in or not...so fingers crossed.

To J, no matter what happens, I'm very proud of you.  Any school would be lucky to have you as their student.  Not only will you learn from them, but I think you will also have a lot to offer in return.  Your dad and I will support you and guide you in this new endeavor.  We love you...unconditionally.

Happiness...with lazy weekends

We had  quite a relaxed weekend this past week.  Had the chance to take the boys with my mom to try out Cyma at Greenbelt 3 last Saturday night.  Glad they liked the pita bread with Tzatziki.  It's a good opportunity to introduce new cuisine to their young palettes.    

Bungisngis!

This face says it all...YUMMY!

Look at their clean plates :)

Also took them for a site visit yesterday morning, and they wanted a photo with the excavator in the background.

Happy Monday! :) 

Happiness at...Bonifacio High Street

Since it was the long weekend here in Manila this past week, our family decided to venture out to Bonifacio High Street in Taguig for our usual Sunday dinner.  The kids had fun playing at the new courtyard where there were new restaurants that opened.  We had dinner at Sariwon Korean Barbeque.  After dinner, they went out and ran and ran and ran...It was one of the more relaxing weekends we've had in a while since there was no school the next day.  We were also able to try Jamba Juice and find out what the fuss was all about.  

whew!  we're tired

With Cousin L

  

Smile!

It was a great long weekend, wish we can have more of these.

A Repost: From Kahlil Gibran

From KAHLIL GIBRAN

Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.

You may give them your love but not your thoughts,
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow,
which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.
You may strive to be like them,
but seek not to make them like you.
For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.

You are the bows from which your children
as living arrows are sent forth.
The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite,
and He bends you with His might
that His arrows may go swift and far.
Let your bending in the archer's hand be for gladness;
For even as He loves the arrow that flies,
so He loves also the bow that is stable.

My super long weekend...sort of

On my way home from work last Friday night, it started pouring hard.  Needless to say, traffic was a b**ch.  And when I got home, hubby told me to look at our laptop computer. Waaaahhh, this is what I came home to!  All the keys were piled up by the side of the laptop and there's only blank little white things on the computer itself!  My little munchkins were none too worried about what they did, but readily said sorry for this transgression.

my kawawang laptop

Saturday night came, and when hubby and I got home from work, yaya immediately told me what the two little devils did that day.  First, Kenji poured a half bottle of virgin coconut oil on our bed.  To clean up his mess,  he poured a full bottle of "green water" (rubbing alcohol) on top of it and used our blanket to dry it up.  Whaaaah!!!!  That's not all.  He found my stock of Ventolin nebules on the dresser drawer and opened them one by one.  By the time yaya found them, he's already emptied 10 tubes and was trying to wipe them off with tissue paper.  Imagine the mess they created.  And money down the drain.

I asked Joshua who the culprit was and he kept on pointing the finger at Kenji.  I asked him what he was doing.  He didn't want to say but I was sure he was laughing so hard that it egged on his little brother to do more.  So frustrating.  I asked Kenji what he did and he said "I was playing."  I couldn't spank them by then since it was already a couple of hours after the fact and I could only talk to them and repeat to them that the next time it happened, there will be consequences.

By Sunday morning, both my boys were sick.  Joshua had a cough and Kenji had a fever.  They were both so quiet and I had to quarantine one from the other.  Kenji wouldn't leave my side and just wanted me to carry him around the whole day.  It made me realize that all those things that were lost the previous days were nothing.  They were just material things and I can always replace them.  But my two boys are irreplaceable.  

Both are feeling much better today and are back to being their noisy selves.  Just hope our mattress won't smell too bad the next couple of days.  

Happiness with...Just.Be.Enough

Wandered through this website called Just Be Enough and thought that it was worth sharing.


From their site ~
"Just.Be.Enough. will share the stories, the voices, the truths of many. Its mission is to empower, inspire, and remind women, parents, and children that that the time has come to celebrate ourselves. We must. We must carry the weight of confidence and empowerment on our shoulders instead of allowing the burden of our flaws and imperfections to push us down."


Enjoy!

School of Success

I Got a Boy - From Chicken Soup for the Soul: New Moms

I Got a Boy

By Stacey Tucker

Boy, n.: a noise with dirt on it.
~Not Your Average Dictionary

When I got pregnant it was exciting, but scary. I was thirty-three at the time. For most of my twenties, I didn't think I wanted children. But as I aged, I realized I did want a child. So, after three years of marriage, we were ready to try. Throughout the early weeks of pregnancy, I focused on my physical changes. I managed the nausea and weight gain and mood swings pretty well. There was also one thing I knew for sure: I wanted a girl.

Being a girl was all I knew. I am an only child and was always a girly girl. Before I got pregnant and through my early weeks of pregnancy, I did as much positive thinking and law of attraction work that one person can do. I was preparing for my girl. My mother had died in 2004, and I was ready to name my daughter Alexandra after my mother. We had it all set.


Twenty weeks of pregnancy finally arrived. Ultrasound wand on the belly, the technician gave me the news: "It's a boy!" I was in shock. As soon as I started to breathe again, I burst into tears. A boy. I couldn't believe it. The possibility of having a boy honestly never entered my mind. I cried all the way home from the doctor's office and all that night. What was I going to do with a boy? I hate sports and dirt.


Fast forward to Jackson's birth. When the nurse handed that little bundle to me, I thought I had never seen such perfection. All I wanted to do was take care of this little boy and love him with my whole being. I felt so ashamed of myself for thinking even for a second that I wanted a girl instead of this amazing creature looking at me with his giant blue eyes. I cried tears of happiness and tears of sadness simultaneously. My son was truly a lesson from God. He knew a boy would be good for me. Girls I knew, but boys?


Oh, what a world I have discovered and grown to appreciate. Every day with my son is a lesson for me on stepping outside my comfort zone. Instead of sitting in a chair at the beach, I am chasing a boy who is chasing seagulls. Instead of getting my nails painted, I am getting my face painted to support our favorite sports team. Instead of playing with dolls, I am playing with trucks. I have made peace with dirt, dead things, living things, mystery liquids and chocolate milk on the sofa. I have learned that getting jumped on, stepped on, kicked by flailing limbs and head butts are all forms of "wrestling." I have had to get in shape to keep up with my toddler and change my wardrobe to accommodate impromptu batting practice and tackle football in the yard. I have learned not to wear flip-flops in the woods.


My son has taught me how to remain in the present moment, no daydreaming on the job. My son has taught me how to laugh at myself and at everyday experiences. Rolling down a hill can actually be fun, and water guns on a hot day can be refreshing. My son has taught me how to be more open -- open to love someone else and open to love myself. He is my perpetual lesson in absolute faith in our own perfection. I am supposed to be the teacher in this relationship, but I seem to be learning something new every day. One thing I know for sure: I am so thankful I got a boy.

A Beautiful Letter of a Father to His Children

Found this is my inbox today, forwarded by my Ninang to me.  Thought it was a nice way to start the day:

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The following is a beautiful letter written by a father to his children.  The words are actually applicable to all of us, young or old, parents or grandparents.  We can all learn something out of it for sure and use this in guiding and teaching our children.   

Dear Children,

I am writing this to you because of 3 reasons.  Life, fortune and mishaps are unpredictable and nobody knows how long I'll live.  Some words are better said early.  I am your father, and if I don't tell you these, no one else will.  What is written is my own personal bitter experiences that perhaps could save you a lot of unnecessary heartaches.

Remember the following as you go through life...

1. Do not bear grudge towards those who are not good to you. No one has the responsibility of treating you well, except your mother and I. To those who are good to you, you have to treasure it and be thankful, and ALSO you have to be cautious, because, everyone has a motive for every move. When a person is good to you, it does not mean he really likes you. You have to be careful, don't hastily regard him as a real friend.

2. No one is indispensable, nothing in the world that you must possess. Once you understand this idea, it would be easier for you to go through life when people around you don't want you anymore, or when you lose what/who you love most.

3. Life is short. When you waste your life today, tomorrow you would find that life is leaving you. The earlier you treasure your life, the better you enjoy life.

4. Love is but a transient feeling, and this feeling would fade with time and with one's mood. If your so called loved one leaves you, be patient, time will wash away your aches and sadness. Don't over exaggerate the beauty and sweetness of love, and don't over exaggerate the sadness of falling out of love.

5. A lot of successful people did not receive a good education, that does not mean that you can be successful by not studying hard! Whatever knowledge you gain is your weapon in life. One can go from rags to riches, but one has to start from some rags!

6. I do not expect you to financially support me when I am old, either would I financially support your whole life. My responsibility as a supporter ends when you are grown up. After that, you decide whether you want to travel in a public transport or in your limousine, whether rich or poor.

7. You honor your words, but don't expect others to be so. You can be good to people, but don't expect people to be good to you. If you don't understand this, you would end up with unnecessary troubles.

8. I have bought lotteries for umpteen years, but I never strike any prize. That shows if you want to be rich, you have to work hard! There is no free lunch!

9. No matter how much time I have with you, let's treasure the time we have together. We do not know if we would meet again in our next life.

Your Dad

Happy Mother's Day!

My Gift

This is what I got yesterday at Powerplant Mall as a gift to myself.  I think I truly deserve it!  haha.  It's a charm pendant from the newly opened store of Thomas Sabo.  They display a wide array of charm pendants for you to choose.  I picked the charm holder plus these 4 pendants - the letters "J" and "K" for my sons' initials, the sneakers for my husband and the red heart locket for me.  The cross pendant and chain are my own.  So cute, right?

To all the moms in the world, a Happy Mothers Day!

From Tina Fey - Bossypants

"The Mother's Prayer for its Daughter" by Tina Fey

First, Lord: No tattoos. May neither Chinese symbol for truth nor Winnie-the-Pooh holding the FSU logo stain her tender haunches.

May she be Beautiful but not Damaged, for it’s the Damage that draws the creepy soccer coach’s eye, not the the Beauty.

When the Crystal Meth is offered,

May she remember the parents who cut her grapes in half

And stick with Beer.

Guide her, protect her

When crossing the street, stepping onto boats, swimming in the ocean, swimming in pools, walking near pools, standing on the nearby subway platform, crossing 86th Street, stepping off of boats, using mall restrooms, getting on and off escalators, driving on country roads while arguing, leaning on large windows, walking in parking lots, riding Ferris wheels, roller-coasters, log flumes, or anything called “Hell Drop,” “Tower of Torture,” or “The Death Spiral Rock N’ Zero G Roll featuring Aerosmith,” and standing on any kind of balcony ever, anywhere, at any age.

Lead her away from Acting but not all the way to Finance.

Something where she can make her own hours but still feel intellectually fulfilled and get outside sometimes

And not have to wear high heels.

What would that be, Lord? Architecture? Midwifery? Golf course design? I’m asking You because if I knew, I’d be doing it, Youdammit.

May she play the Drums to the fiery rhythm of her Own Heart with the sinewy strength of her Own Arms, so she need Not Lie With Drummers.

Grant her a Rough Patch from twelve to seventeen.

Let her draw horses and be interested in Barbies for much too long,

For Childhood is short -- a Tiger Flower blooming

Magenta for one day --

And Adulthood is long and Dry-Humping in Cars will wait.

O Lord, break the Internet forever,

That she may be spared the misspelled invective of her peers

And the online marketing campaign for Rape Hostel V: Girls Just Wanna Get Stabbed.

And when she one day turns on me and calls me a Bitch in front of Hollister,

Give me the strength, Lord, to yank her directly into a cab in front of her friends,

For I will not have that Shit. I will not have it.

And should she choose to be a Mother one day, be my eyes, Lord,

That I may see her, lying on a blanket on the floor at 4:50 a.m., all-at-once exhausted, bored, and in love with the little creature whose poop is leaking up its back.

“My mother did this for me once,” she will realize as she cleans feces off her baby’s neck.

“My mother did this for me.” And the delayed gratitude will wash over her as it does each generation and she will make a Mental note to call me. And she will forget.

But I’ll know, because I peeped it with Your God eyes.

Amen.

Motherlode - In Praise of Pink Polish

I honestly don't see what the big deal is about boys wanting to play with "girly" stuff.  Living in the Philippines, where it is culturally more conservative, or as what people would like to appear to others, there is still this stigma that boys who choose to play with dolls and who wear pink will turn out gay.  I'm surprised by the reaction I get when I say that I want to buy dolls to play with my boys, since we usually get toy cars and trucks as gifts from friends and family.


I just don't believe it that girly toys will make boys gays, and manly toys will make girls lesbians.  It's just not possible.  I grew up with 2 boys and played with their guns and trucks and what-nots, and I'm still as girly as they get.  Read the article below and see what you think.


*********************************************************************************************************
April 14, 2011, 1:03 PM
By LISA BELKIN


My inbox makes it clear that you want a chance to discuss boys and pink nail polish, aka “How a Photo of a Mom Spending Time with Her Son Fed the Culture Wars.”


For those who have not been following it, a quick recap by the writer Katie Phillips on the Web site Forbeswoman.com:


In an online promotional photo entitled ‘Saturday with Jenna,’ J. Crew President and Executive Creative Director Jenna Lyons poses playfully with her five-year-old son Beckett. The picture, meant to depict carefree weekend leisure and feature ‘off-duty’ fashion staples, shows Jenna and Beckett, laughing and cheerful, with a jar of crayons and a bottle of pink nail polish on a table beside them – the same shade of Essie polish that’s featured prominently on Beckett’s toes. The caption below reads: “Lucky for me, I ended up with a boy whose favorite color is pink. Toenail painting is way more fun in neon.”


As expected, the Gender Police have emerged from their dark caves in flocks and a national debate has ensued about the “correct” way to raise children, as well as the importance of honoring one’s biologically assigned gender.


Erin Brown of the right-leaning Cultural Media Institute has called the advertisement “blatant propaganda celebrating transgendered children” in an article that claims Beckett has been exploited for the sake of identity-politics. The choice of the word “celebrating” is an interesting one. I’ll address that later.


Dr. Keith Ablow, Fox News contributor, wrote this offensive piece about how “our culture is being encouraged to abandon all trappings of gender identity” in favor of a more “homogenized” model; the effects of which, Dr. Ablow admits, remain to be seen. He doesn’t hesitate to theorize on the potential outcome of such a liberal approach to child rearing, throwing around offhand comments about “Prozac” and “psychotherapy,” doling out judgments as swiftly as he claims psychiatrists prescribe drugs.
Other voices rose up too, praising J. Crew for blasting through gender stereotypes, and chastising Dr. Ablow and Ms. Brown. Change.org created an online petition to “Thank J. Crew for its heartwarming” ad, and last I checked it had over 7,500 electronic signatures.


And Jon Stewart offered up his own summary last night.


Time to add your thoughts.


Does painting a boy’s toes pink somehow “make” him gay, or transgendered? Is his mother irresponsibly exposing him to ridicule by “celebrating” his love of pink and polish? Or is the problem that there’s not enough celebration out there of kids in all their varieties, and is this a step in the right direction?

Happy 3rd Birthday Joshua!

Happy 3rd Birthday Joshua!


I can't believe you are no longer "almost three", but really three years old today.  It seems like yesterday when Daddy and Mommy brought you home from the hospital and I had no idea on how to take care of you.  I had to rely on yaya, Ama and Doctor Joy's help to get me through the anxieties and uncertainties of caring for you.  You were so tiny then, that you could fit snuggly in my arm.  And we would take naps together in the afternoon that first month so that I could recover my strength after labor, and you could grow up to be bigger and stronger.  But the truth is, I just watched you sleep.  Coz I couldn't get over the fact that this little miracle is finally here with me.


With all the "firsts" that you went through this year, Daddy and Mommy couldn't be prouder!  You can now go to the bathroom by yourself, brush your teeth, put on your pants by yourself, comb your hair and talk non-stop!  When we started school last year, you cried and cried coz you were so scared of us leaving you.  But now, you really love school and found your confidence.  You've also gained new friends and new people who love you.  But don't grow up too fast, ok?  I don't want you driving cars anytime soon.


Happy birthday my little ray of sunshine.  Stay as sweet, joyful and loving as you are.  More wonderful years to come.  Mommy and Daddy love you very much!

Pregnancy Journal - Part II (KENJI)

My Pre-Kenji Life:  Before I had Kenji, I already had an 8 month old at home.  We really didn't plan on when we would be having our 2nd child, but we just knew that we were going to have them close in age.  I felt like I wasn't really getting any younger so the next few years would be crucial in our decision on how many kids we want to have.

The First Inkling: Rod and I went to Indonesia to attend his friend's wedding in Surabaya in February 2009.  And after the wedding, we decided to stop by Bali, since we've been hearing a lot of good stuff about it.  It was also a chance for me to travel again, after a long while, since I really wasn't allowed to travel while I was pregnant with Joshua.  And it was our chance to take some time together, just the two of us.  Since I have a very long and irregular cycle, I really didn't think that I could get pregnant so fast and easily.  But when March 2009 came around and I still didn't get my period, I just knew I was pregnant.  I took several pregnancy tests since the first few came out negative.  But I still had a feeling that I was pregnant even if the tests said otherwise.  So after a week of waiting for the tests to catch up with what I knew, my pregnancy was confirmed.   

Picking a Name: This time around, my pregnancy was a lot easier on my body.  I guess it was because I already knew what to expect, so I wasn't as stressed or worried about it.  I ate what I wanted, did what I wanted and just relaxed.  I also had Joshua at home already so I really didn't have that much time to worry.  

At first I thought I was going to have a girl, because everyone was complimenting me about my "special pregnancy glow".  And I did agree that I looked better this time.  But for some reason, at the back of my mind, I also had the thought that this was going to be another boy.  We picked out the name "Kenji" because I heard a father calling his son this name at the airport and I really loved it.  When i checked the meaning of the name, our minds were made up because Kenji meant "intelligent 2nd son", which is quite appropriate.  The middle name "Lee" is my mother's maiden name.  

The First Trimester: By the time I visited my OB's clinic and had my first TV ultrasound, I was also around 8 weeks pregnant and given a November 6, 2009 due date.  This ironically was also Rod and my official engagement date.  The first three months were quite similar with what I went through with Joshua.  Aside from a few bouts of morning sickness, everything was textbook and normal with my pregnancy. I tried to get as much sleep as possible because I felt so tired everyday and I had to stay away from the kitchen. Strong scents and tastes made me queasy so I ate very bland food like hard boiled egg with rice,and I didn't like the sight of dark / black food.

The Second Trimester: When I entered my 2nd Trimester, I did worry a bit that I might have the same problems as my previous pregnancy with Joshua and having to be put on bed rest.  But thankfully, everything went smoothly and my routine stayed the same.  By the 6th month, it was confirmed that we were having another baby boy.  It was so clear on the ultrasound, the technician didn't even hesitate.  Here's a 4d photo of Kenji while in my womb.  Amazing how clear images are today right?

The Third Trimester: By this time, I really felt like I needed a break.  I really expected to give birth earlier than my due date because that's what happened the first time around, but Kenji really had a mind of his own.  As my due date drew nearer, he was no where near ready to come out.  My tummy was really getting big and he was getting heavier everyday.  I because clumsy and so ungraceful.  I also ate a lot this time coz I was constantly hungry, and I wanted big honking steaks to boot!  I also craved sweets and my cousin was laughing at me coz I think I ate almost every 2 hours in the office.

But this was also the time that Typhoon Ondoy hit the country.  My cousin and I were stranded in the office that fateful Saturday because we saw that even Buendia was flooded.  We were lucky that we were able to reach home safely by 5pm, with no traffic and flooding along the way.  Rod was out of the country that time and I had to drive myself to and from work everyday.  He got stranded in Hongkong that day, so Josh and I stayed at my mom's place since they had electricity, while our house was completely dark.  Thank God we survived Ondoy.

My Changing Body:  Although my tummy was really big this time around, I also gained the recommended amount of weight, like about 25-30 lbs. the whole 9 months.  This time I had really bad stretch marks in my tummy as Kenji really grew and grew inside of me, but I still seem to have really good hair and nails.  By time time I hit my 39th week, I was miserable and just wanted to give birth.  But imagine my disappointment when I had my doctor's visit on November 7th, and my OB told me that my cervix was still closed and not even 1cm dilated.

My Labour Experience:  So imagine my surprise when I woke up at 4am November 8th already in full-fledge active labour!  I woke up to go to the bathroom and I felt like my back was aching and I kept on feeling contractions.  At first I thought this couldn't be coz I wasn't even 1 cm dilated the previous day.  But I woke Rod up and told him that we needed to get to the hospital.  By 6am, I was in the delivery room, being prepped since the resident doctor told me that I was about to give birth and 8cm dilated!  She told me not to push at all as I might just give birth right there and then.  Good thing my OB lived nearby and was able to be there in time.  After 20 minutes of pushing, we welcomed Kenji Lee Uy Chua into my arms at 7:20am.  He was born 8 lbs, 1oz , 51 cm long.  All the nurses were telling me how big my baby boy was.  I was just so happy that he's finally in my arms, and not inside of me kicking and stretching my tummy even more!  And my Rod was with me again the whole time, taking pictures and making sure that we were okay.

God, the abuse our bodies take during our pregnancies.  But it truly is a labour of love...and all worth it when we have our healthy babies finally in our arms.

Joshua's first haircut - Oct 24, 2010

I've always cut Joshua's hair since he was a baby.  Just bought a hair clipper at SM Appliances and gave him a nice clean buzz cut.  But since he started going to school, I decided to grow his hair out and slowly move into bringing him to a real barber shop.  At first I was the one who trimmed the sides of his hair, but when it started becoming "malikot" and I couldn't get a straight cut, his dad and I finally brought him to Cuts 4 Tots at Greenhills V-mall for his first official haircut.  It wasn't as traumatic as I was expecting it to be, and he came out with a great cut!

Before we left from home.

Distracting him with a Thomas the Train movie on TV.

Prepping.... he chose to ride a car and it's time for a cut! 

Hmmm... should I worry mom?

Snip, snip, snip....buzz, buzz, buzz.....

Ta-dah!  Love the new cut!

Cheers!

A Dying Mother’s Letter

From Motherlode

December 9, 2010, 11:20 AM

By LISA BELKIN

Saul Loeb/Agence France-Presse — Getty Images

Maybe it is because I write a parenting blog. Probably it is simply because I am a parent. Whatever the reason, I spent yesterday thinking of the youngest Edwards children, 12-year-old Emma Claire and 10-year-old Jack — of the lifelong pain that comes from losing a parent so young, and of the searing sadness that parent feels, knowing she will be leaving.

I remembered a story I read years ago, about how Elizabeth Edwards was readying her children for the day she would die. She was writing them a letter — a primer of sorts — about everything a mother realizes she won’t be there to say. I tracked that story down yesterday, to a 2007 article by the People magazine reporter Sandra Sobieraj Westfall, written when John Edwards was still in the presidential race. It said:

There is a letter Elizabeth Edwards has been writing, on and off, ever since she saw “Terms of Endearment,” the 1983 movie in which a dying mother leaves behind advice for her children. Edwards’s version, although titled “dying letter” on her computer, is actually more a guide to living for the three children she is preparing to someday leave behind. “It’s more than ‘How do you get the core out of a head of lettuce?’ ” Edwards says while taking a break during a campaign stop in Iowa. “It’s ‘How you choose who you marry and what to expect from that, how you choose a church.’ ” Looking across a playground at her two youngest monkeying on the jungle gym, she chuckles: “It’s got all that butting-my-nose-into-their-lives-long-after-I’m-gone stuff.”

On Good Morning America yesterday morning, Westfall recalled asking Elizabeth about that letter just a few months ago. Was it finished, she wondered, or was there still tweaking and adding to do?

“I’ll never be done,” Westphall says Edwards answered. “A mother is never finished giving advice to her children.”

I have been mentally composing a letter of life advice to my boys for the past 24 hours, but I am daunted by the enormity of the task. Where to begin? What to include?

What would you want to be certain to write?