Another day in bed.  Today I’m officially 24 weeks.

I thought being on bed rest would be sheer heaven, days and days of doing nothing.  Not until I was actually put on it.  I can’t even go down to have my meals anymore.  I’m only allowed bathroom privileges like going to the toilet and taking a shower.  Other than that, I’m stuck in bed, and I take my meals in bed.   

And with the long endless hours that I spend in bed, you can’t help but have all these thoughts and worries. 

I worry that I won’t be able to carry our baby to term. 
I worry that with all the medication I am taking right now, that our baby will be affected and not be healthy. 
I worry that I will have an emergency and I won’t have any way to contact Rod to take me to the hospital. 
I worry about all the work that I have left behind in the office. 
I worry that I won’t be able to cope with the pain of labor. 
I worry that I won’t get better and I will be on bed rest for the rest of my pregnancy.
I worry that my husband would get sick and tired of me and just leave me all alone.
I worry that I won’t be a good mother.

Being on bed rest is very isolating and it can be depressing.  You feel so all alone and you just wait for the time to pass you by.  The television and your laptop become your best friends.  The most exciting time of my day is when I hear the gate opening and I know that my husband is home.  How pathetic is that?  You also feel like you are sick with some grave disease because people tend to stay away and keep their distance.  Seems like they don’t want to catch whatever is bothering you. 

In spite of all these worries and sadness that I am feeling, I am still thankful and happy about some things.

I am thankful for the time that I get to spend on my own so that I can get some much needed rest.     
I am happy when I feel my baby kicking me hard in my belly.  This reassures me that he is growing fine and healthy.
I am happy because every uneventful day that I spend in bed means that I am a day closer to delivering a healthy baby.
Most of all, I am thankful that my husband is still very malambing and very caring.  He takes very good care of me and never fails to tell me and show me that he loves me very much.

That’s all for today.  Later.